The "New iPad" is ridiculous: here's why Apple didn't give it a name

The "New iPad" is ridiculous: here's why Apple didn't give it a name
So there you have it: the New iPad! Wait, what? Yes, it’s not the iPad 3, nor the iPad HD. It’s not even the iPad Retina, or anything meaningful you would think of. It’s the “New iPad” and this is just ridiculous. Seriously, Apple, you didn’t forget to give it a name, did you?

We have one theory, which is just saying out loud what probably most of you are thinking. Since many will be getting the “New iPad,” that would leave the rest with the “Old iPad.” How uncool is that? No one would want to end up with the “Old iPad,” right? That’s one way Apple could have looked at it and let’s face it - there’s no way Cupertino didn’t think about that before launching its first most important product after the iPhone.

And we understand that it might actually work for the company's marketing. But this is a cheap move Apple. We for one feel a bit offended - weren't we worth a real name? Or is "iPad 3/HD/whatever" too complicated?

Afar from that, the “New iPad” is serious business with a stunning Retina display, a new powerful A5X chip with even better graphics, and improved cameras. It deserved a name, but it didn’t get one.

And the real bottomline is that we don’t actually know why Apple didn’t find it necessary to add a “3” or an “HD” after “iPad.” There could have been a better reason, but honestly we’re not getting it. Are you? Let us know your theories in the comments below.

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65 Comments

67. chapizzo

Posts: 116; Member since: Sep 13, 2011

iPad 2 Reborn would have been a better name.

64. CRICKETownz

Posts: 980; Member since: Oct 24, 2009

why not call it just the "New iPad"? people have been griping about how each version of whatever Apple releases is almost the same as its predecessor. i would say the name fits just what the people expect out of the latest offering.

61. hepresearch unregistered

Don't you just absolutely love it when your favorite tech company, which you have been a loyal and adoring fan of for years, decides that they must socially shame you into buying "the New iPad" or whatever next-gen product you already have the previous iteration of? Yeah, that amazing iPad 2 you finally scraped together enough cash to buy a few months back has now been eclipsed by "the New iPad", which is "New", and your 3-month-old iPad 2 is now "Old". You do realize, as a faithful Apple customer, that your "Old iPad" is no longer cool, and if you fail to come in and buy "the New iPad", we will have no choice but to be forced to revoke your mobile-device man-card... Why would anyone allow a corporation to shame them into replacing their perfectly decent, and working, existing product? If I adored some company and their products, and they turned around and told me that I'm dumb and socially-backward for not immediately buying their "New Whatever" upon release, I would refuse to buy any more of their products... but this is Apple we're talking about, so I suppose a ton of people could hear the call and head in to throw away some more cash and trade up ASAP. They'll probably be really happy and thankful that Apple cared enough about their social standing to warn them of the upcoming threat to their current mobile-iAwesomeness...

65. cellphonator

Posts: 298; Member since: Oct 29, 2011

Every tech company comes up with something new every year, this seems to be the trend. It's to increase profits using the wow factor of the new thing. But do you think that Apple, or any other company, is telling everybody that owns an iPad 2 to get rid of that to buy the new one? Maybe the people who has the first one is a major target. Of course they would love if you do that, but that's not the main purpose, it's that they have to because people expect it. Imagine if Apple says, ok this year nothing new, sorry folks...what happens? Oh wow nothing new?....disappointing, the other company did it and you don't? You ran out of ideas? Stocks go down (although it did anyway this time) etc. I think that who has the iPad 2 and feels compelled to drop it in favor of the The New iPad (ridiculous name btw) is out of its mind, me think :) and certainly there are many out there but not the majority.

66. hepresearch unregistered

Just watch Twitter for a few days... Apple has developed such a following and set of socially-connected expectations that go along with them, a "culture of the latest-and-greatest" if you will, that it is happening exactly this way. Many of those who recently bought an iPad 2, who cannot simply afford to jump up and get "the New iPad" right away, will, in their immense shallowness, feel intimidated by their peers who do get "the New iPad" and will complain about it. Apple, more than any other company, I think, has spawned this pervasive cultural identity among its customers, where they are led to believe that if they have the latest iDevice then they are in the in-crowd, and that folks who have an older iDevice are almost just as dead to them as those who don't even have one... not all of them buy into this, but quite a few do, and the ones who do buy into this often frequent us with the preaching of their own immense iRighteousness. The result is that Apple helps a lot of their customers into feeling constantly ashamed and behind the times, and helps some others into thinking that they are tech gods and are more tech savvy and trendy than any "common" smartphone owner... even though many probably never bothered to learn anything about programming or electronics or anything useful. The iPhone was designed to make you feel like you're in charge of everything, and yet to also suck out your soul in the process... it is nothing but a smartphone for people who dislike PC's and "common" smartphones. The iPhone is so "effortless" because you are not really in control, no real effort is required, and very little is even allowed.

58. roscuthiii

Posts: 2383; Member since: Jul 18, 2010

New iPad? Is that like New Coke?

62. hepresearch unregistered

Yeah, it is like that... but also cut 50/50 with powdered cherry kool-aid... It might be slightly dry, flat, and grainy in your teeth, and it'll taste a lot fruitier...

53. LoneShaolin

Posts: 307; Member since: Jan 14, 2012

I don't want to live on this planet anymore.......

49. 7thspaceman

Posts: 1597; Member since: Feb 14, 2011

Hmm folks they cannot be sued anymore if the name of their Tablet is the "New Ipad" Hmm I think they should have renamed it "Newton" a name of a Tablet Apple made way back in the day. Hmm it did'nt sell too well but Apple own's the trade mark name. Proview eat your heart out

44. Jyakotu

Posts: 868; Member since: Dec 12, 2008

Most consumers will still call it the iPad 3. Can't tell you how many people call the iPod Touch the iTouch. *shudders*

47. Mandroid

Posts: 209; Member since: Feb 22, 2012

OMG right? I look at them like they are the stupidest creature I've ever met, and ask when it came out because to the best of my knowledge there is no such thing as an "iTouch". Then they look at me like I'M the iDiot, f***ing drones....

51. nb2six

Posts: 298; Member since: Apr 27, 2011

It literally makes me want to devour someone's soul when they call an ipod touch that terrible word.

57. Mandroid

Posts: 209; Member since: Feb 22, 2012

I'm going to go into a Ford dealership and ask for the new Vroom Drive. I can make up words too!

42. AbsentbebniM

Posts: 21; Member since: Feb 09, 2012

The answer is simple. It's a step forward from the original iPad. Most Apple products don't have new official names applied. iPods aren't given renames, it's the public that adds the "X Generation" designation. iMacs are typically referred to in accordance with their processor, screen size, or release time, but most of that is public generated as well. The whole adding of numbers is silly. Can you imagine if Ford gave new numbered (or whatever differentiator) to each new Taurus they put out? How many people complained when Volkwagen put out "The New Beetle" rather than the Beetle 2? ..as an aside, they actually numbered the Jettas back in the day and it was simply ridiculous.

41. troybuilt

Posts: 155; Member since: Dec 16, 2011

cr@pple just didn't give it a name because they know that their iFans are mentally challenged and they don't need to spend more money over names. Just like the iPhone 4. People call it the iPhone 4G. News flash iFans, it's not a 4G phone! I'm sure if they would've called an iPad 4 iFans would call it an iPad 4G. iFans are just stupid and don't even know their own crappy devices. Besides I think Proview should see this as a copyright infringement. Once again Apple stealing names.

40. cellphonator

Posts: 298; Member since: Oct 29, 2011

iFail 2 (once in a while, we're human after all). I'm sure there is a valid reason, they just will never tell you but it's indeed disappointing.

38. coy2013

Posts: 10; Member since: Mar 06, 2012

Lmao the name "new ipad" its a revolutionary name for such a device this changes EVERYTHING again.....not

35. Stinger2U

Posts: 16; Member since: Feb 17, 2012

I think it's pretty obvious why they didn't name their new iPad - and iPhone is to blame. They weren't sure how would they name the new iphone. They cant call it iphone 5 because it is the 6th iphone. They cant call it iPhone 6 because everyone would be wondering : "where did the 5th iphone go?". So they probably decided to ditch all names and call every iphone just iphone, and every ipad - ipad. I could bet all my money that the next iphone will be named just "iphone".

43. troybuilt

Posts: 155; Member since: Dec 16, 2011

If they did make an iPhone 6. iFans would call it an iPhone 6G. I remember when rumors last year about the iPhone 5 coming out people were already calling an iPhone 5G. Seriosuly? No carrier has a 5G network. I guess they think Apple makes devices 2-3 years ahead of technology and from what I've seen Apple makes their devices 2-3 years behind technology.

46. Mandroid

Posts: 209; Member since: Feb 22, 2012

I think you're giving iDiots way too much credit. You have to remember how incredibly simple they are. They can do little more than bleat, chew grass, and play their darling lil' tap games on their astronomically overpriced iPods (all idevices are variations on the ipod, but SSHHHH don't tell the sheep!

34. quryous

Posts: 106; Member since: Mar 07, 2012

Its obvious to me, they intend for everyone to change the name of their iFad 2 to iFad Classic, with a little swoosh below it! See, simple, as in simplton.

29. HGMIV

Posts: 52; Member since: Feb 15, 2012

So what's this one going to be called when the next iPad comes out?

32. EclipseGSX

Posts: 1778; Member since: Oct 18, 2011

The old new iPad :P

59. cellphonator

Posts: 298; Member since: Oct 29, 2011

I don't like the idea of offending people because they like Apple, but your avatar made me laugh like a mad man!

27. Virile

Posts: 38; Member since: Mar 01, 2012

My guess it has to do with Proview, apple isnt going to name a device a name that they might not own anymore. Though with only 9 days until release they need to do something.

22. SleepingOz unregistered

It'll be named IPOD TOUCH 9.7 HD

20. fraydoe

Posts: 57; Member since: Dec 27, 2011

come on apple your better than that >.>

24. SuperAndroidEvo

Posts: 4888; Member since: Apr 15, 2011

Not really!

14. chapizzo

Posts: 116; Member since: Sep 13, 2011

the second i found out its called the new ipad, i knew this article was coming. Thought Samsung had run out of better names for their tablets! Actually, samsung should sue apple for copying them by failing to come up with a better name for the ipad.

50. Cwebb

Posts: 501; Member since: Oct 05, 2011

Bashing Crapsung and krApple in the same comment, I like you already!

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