Humor: Apple Watch gets a pre-launch pep-talk

Humor: Apple Watch gets a pre-launch pep-talk
With news of the imminent release of the Apple Watch making the rounds over the past week or so, the world is justifiably interested in how the final product is going to take shape.

We have not seen so much of what the Apple Watch will bring to the table since it was announced at WWDC months ago. The speculation over price, availability, and real-life functionality has been well contained by Cupertino, save for an interactive demo put together by a developer team making an app for the smartwatch.

Apple has been on a roll since it launched the first iPhone 8 years ago. Aside from Apple Maps, and the most recent iOS update, the company has not had too many missteps. That has not always been the case as you may well know, however.

Still, Apple has more “hits” than “misses,” even though the latter category has a couple memorable ones.  Products that did not soar as high as hoped included the Apple Power Mac G4 “Cube,” or the Bandai Pippin, and who can forget Newton?

Still, this humorous take on a “pep-talk” is apropos. Apple will not be the first to market with a wearable, but you can bet that love-it or hate-it, it is going to make an impact on the market.

source: The Joy of Tech



1. Mxyzptlk unregistered

My body is ready

3. omar300

Posts: 210; Member since: Jun 24, 2012

Times have changed. Other companies started to make SmartWatch 2 years ahead of Apple and 'Phablet' too. So now Apple is the one playing catchup game. I am sure they will sell billions but that doesnt mean their devices will be superior. Also now they wont be setting 'standard market price' as they did with iphone so now people will clearly see when they are being ripped off with watching costing $1000 when it should be $200.

5. AlikMalix unregistered

You wanna talk "catchup"? 64bit, TouchID, (no, Atrix didnt work), CarPlay + aftermarket head manufacturers, 3rd party support for home automation, health tracking, etc. Android cant even set proper app permissions to EVERYTHING or ability to get GooglePay get traction - I cannot go to any ATM or Bank without being offered ApplePay options. Android cant even push latest Android past 1% and it's been months since Lollipop is out. Apple may not be pushing first on making things bigger or adding more ram, but they push the technological abilities - just look at the latest iPhone with half the specs still runs as fast (and at somethings faster) than leading Android phones... I'm not discrediting Android manufacturers for their push in technology, but there are more important things than adding RAM and Megapixels...

7. engineer-1701d unregistered

alik my friend you dont know what your saying first of all 64 bit was all the talk apple just jumped the gun and launched early with no real support for it app wise. touchid was moto atrix it workded to prove it could be done on phones laptops already had that on them years before apple, car play is a joke its ranked 3rd or 4th compaired to android auto number 1 plus all after market head units are dual aa and cp. duhhh home automation has been out for years before apple got into it and they have not just to let you know other 3rd party have been on sale for 2 years now. health tracking and a study shows 83% of people dont want tracking but it was done by all other companies before apple. apple just copied healthkit also a company that is in australia who is sueing apple for taking there name and not paying for it as they always do. its called google wallet not pay its been around for years in all countries apples wannabe just got into it because the isuis or what ever they called it failed hard core. lollipop just came out a month ago and it on many phones what your not saying is the 10,000 types of phones it will be on not like 3 iphones. apple is adding ram and bigger mp on 6s because they found out bigger screen needs more ram to push it and hold it, not like the little 3.5 and 4 of apples other models. apples the new phone yet slower then note 4 and nexus, lets see a 6plus vs nexus 6 and note 4 and watch it get burned again. you think apple is great but all it does is open apps hens the app les name even the apple watch is copied from braun's watch

12. AlikMalix unregistered

well, it's been more than a year since apples first 64bit phone - where's androids solution. By Feb 2015 all new apps are going 64bit, and by summer time all that existing apps are to be updated - where's Android? I tried Atrix it was a joke, laptops need several tries and not as quick and consistent like touch ID. Car Play is so much less destracting than the later Android Auto and already offered on some cars including aftermarket manufacturers like Pioneer and Alpine. I remember walking around Bestbuy, home depot, etc.. and the only thing on those pacages was "works with iPhone" its just recently when you see some including Android.. but the best like Hue is iOS only... Google had to buy NEST just so Android guys can enjoy its products. now apple pushed it further with a unified home automation integration. I need this as I'm not too happy with different hubs in my house - where's android? Healthkit is another way apple helps to organize your health/fitness stats so you can take it with you anywhere (have you seen how deep this feature goes?)... and if you like certain apps - it integrates them too... Samsung jumped the gun with their version right after the rumors that Apple is going to relase a major health compagn (I believe the same was for the smartwatch but I not going to argue as it is just a speculation). But I think the best thing that Android is still trying to figure out, is: Apple made a complexity of several technologies built into one tool be easy to operate even to a non-techie typical joe and that was the beauty of iPhone and every new version and features added after. My mom who's not great in english or tech (she has trouble with a computer mouse) is using an iPhone and an iPad to take care of her daily tasks - I have not shown her anything yet but only suggested some apps like Craigslist client and World Lens (that google bought after it was featured in Apple commercial, btw) I've been following things on my own too, and guess what, Android manufacturers add Ram, and Resolutions and somewhat gimmicky software features (I still see no point of widgets when iOS has been delivering information front and center on OS level all this time), but Apple been pushing the technological bottlenecks that others build on. Yeah iOS got "widgets" now, and bigger screens but what's the point - it's just an upgrade - lets see who can push the necessary boundaries like tiny batteries that last a week or even a month, a expandable/collapsable screen instead of carrying a 6" brick in your pocket, a network owned by manufacturer so that when you buy their phones you are no longer bound to use ATT or Verizon (google may push that one) -- those are examples of true innovation. In the past, an App Store

13. AlikMalix unregistered

.... was something different - before an iphone the only apps you can get are the ones your phones manufacturer made... now anyone can submit and you can make your phone to do just about anything, remember "there's an app for that" lingo? Apple also saw a future in voice assistant so they bough Siri and built upon that -- that's vision. Touch ID is now making more sense beyond unlocking phones, that's a push that no product with a fingerprint sensor tried. But if you think bigger screens and old way of managing files is future - then I can understand why you and so many prefer Android... and that's not a bad thing, some of us just "think different"....

19. RebelwithoutaClue unregistered

I tend to disagree on a few points, widgets can be amazing if done right. Maybe not to your liking, but it does allow the homescreen to be personal. It's not all about info. Also about how easy to use an iOS device is, sure anyone can click icons and work with it, same goes for Android. But when it comes to more indepth use, they can be as troublesome as any other device (I should know, my 75 y/o dad uses an Iphone which I gave him). About CarPlay being less distracting, I think that is a matter of opinion, I found them equally distracting. And both too limited for my own taste. And my last disagreement is Hue is iOS only, not sure if you meant Philips Hue,but if you did, you are completely wrong. Been using my Hue lights around the house for quite some time now and support is great (not just third party apps, also the original one). Fair point, I do agree on some of your arguments too, like the 64bit, the touchID working better than previous solutions and the integration Apple provides for third party apps to have one place to be accessed (like Home automation) is outstanding and user friendly. Ps I think Symbian had apps too, outside the manufacterur's apps but there wasn't a single integrated appstore.

8. hipnotika

Posts: 353; Member since: Mar 06, 2013

so true Alik !

23. omar300

Posts: 210; Member since: Jun 24, 2012

so you want to talk update? ... you sure? because all what apple does is increase OS numbers and the features are limited to newest version of iDevices. as for processors.... everyone launched it during same time. no big deal. also 64 bit is just another 32 bit. compare iPhone 6 benchmarks with Note 4(which is 32 bit). Apple running fast on half the specs? well try doing things that android does first. android can create and run a server from phone. if you install Android 4.4 or 5 on 3 years old android phone and limit it to limitation of iphone it would be on par. As for apple pay. im glad they did that. i had been waiting. market is sadly very bias towards iPhone so thanks to apple now other more and more stores are starting to support NFC pay. doesnt matter who is providing that. Android, Apple. or some other brand. anyways. do buy me drink from that money ur getting from apple. and if you arent.... man u got too much time.

24. omar300

Posts: 210; Member since: Jun 24, 2012

*not note 4, meant instead Xperia z3.

11. bendgate unregistered

I find it funny when you say that. Especially after Maherk done your and darkkjedii's copy.

21. Berzerk000

Posts: 4275; Member since: Jun 26, 2011

It seems like the Apple Watch is too expensive for what it offers hardware wise, but I'm interested in the software features they haven't announced yet.

2. HugoBarraCyanogenmod

Posts: 1412; Member since: Jul 06, 2014

Don't get the jokes

4. shamrock

Posts: 75; Member since: Mar 29, 2013

yeah! where are the jokes?

20. Spedez

Posts: 542; Member since: Aug 29, 2014

Seems to be just Apple marketing. No jokes.

6. Kishin

Posts: 706; Member since: May 30, 2013

Who will be next after my launch Tim?

9. Malcolm.Merlyn

Posts: 160; Member since: Sep 28, 2014

Even 9gag has better humor than this...

10. Sniggly

Posts: 7305; Member since: Dec 05, 2009

A Joy of Tech comic that's the teensiest bit critical of Apple while still gleefully kissing its ass? WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?! No, but seriously, the guys behind Joy of Tech are the biggest Assle kissers I've ever seen.

14. AlikMalix unregistered

This is the first comic from this guy that wasn't making fun of apple... even this one has a small stab at it's older products... what's your problem?

15. Sniggly

Posts: 7305; Member since: Dec 05, 2009

Uhhh. Apparently you either don't read Joy of Tech or you read the Bizarro version of it, because almost every single strip, even the ones "making fun of" Apple, still manage to suck up to it. For instance, in almost every strip everyone uses Apple products, and even the 'critical" comics manage to squeeze in some praise for Apple, or tout its popularity, or paint its competitors as worse or jealous.

16. AlikMalix unregistered

Maybe you're right, But it seems that in your opinion Apple products do not deserve any praise, or remarks to its popularity, or there's no other phone that's worse than an iphone or there's nothing that Apple products do better than competition... right? Why is it so wrong that other people (including comic artists and bloggers and celeberties and regular people) like/prefer Apple products, like iOS, iTunes, or iPhone, or Maps, or Apple Watch, or etc..? Is it really that wrong to make a comic that praises Apple?

17. Sniggly

Posts: 7305; Member since: Dec 05, 2009

You're arguing with a strawman. My point is that the Assle kissing is incessant. It's not that Apple products are bad, but seeing these guys uniformly worship Apple and disparage almost every other tech company (seriously, they can't mention Google without waxing paranoid about its data collection) gets tiresome and completely unfunny. I'm not saying they can't do what they do, but I reserve the right to dislike the comic as a result.

18. AlikMalix unregistered

That's fair... but they "reserve" the right to praise products they like... But I see more of the opposite where most users here uniformly worship Android and disparage almost everything Apple does (seriously they can't mention Apple without using the words like sheep, or walled garden, etc)... see it swings both ways.. But fact remains, here on PA any good news about Apple products is always dubbed as "worship" "blind" "sheepish" "untrue" "paid advertisement" etc... and so does your remark "assle kissing"... (is that an attempt to put ass into apple brand - because "assdroid" is easier to say, see how easy). You want your posts taken seriously - drop the name calling... and Googles entire business is revolved around data collecting - whether it's old remark or not doesn't mean it's not true... I like Google and they have the right to collect your data if you're willing to give it up as price for their services that are actually very good. But dont fool yourself and align with the haters - apple services and products are equally good on their own....

26. Mxyzptlk unregistered

This is coming from the same guy who considers Motorola the greatest thing ever since sliced bread.

22. fzacek

Posts: 2486; Member since: Jan 26, 2014

Lol, I like that last comment. Apple Watch will soon be on that list of failures...

25. shamrock

Posts: 75; Member since: Mar 29, 2013

sorry to say this my friend, fzacek, that list is not of failures,but lists different apple products that survived inspite of various 'shortcomings' compared to other competitors ... FYI, I'm not an apple fan and I use xperia z1. Just so you know I'm not 'assle' kissing..

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