Vertu re-launches tacky, expensive, helicopter-delivered Cobra Limited Edition phone
Warning – here be snakes! Opulent, red, ruby snakes. If it weren't for the impeccable craftsmanship that went into creating the cobra mosaic out of 439 rubies and 2 emeralds (for the eyes), the re-launched Vertu Signature Cobra Limited Edition would have looked about as tasteful as any other phone by the notorious luxury brand. Not very tasteful.
Vertu phones are "look at how rich I am" phones, not pieces of near-perfection like the Galaxies and iPhones we enjoy today. Still, ruby snakes on a phone is badass any time of the year and we'd gladly have one of these just for kicks, if it weren't for the fact that there are only 8 units made, and each costs about $360k. This is a reissue of a 2006 model, which makes us think there are 8 people in the world who e-mailed Vertu, demanding cobra phones. And the brand jumped on the opportunity – that's $2.88 million for all units sold!
The phone also gets delivered via helicopter, which sounds concerning. We hope the airborne couriers don't just fly by your condo and casually toss the package down from several kilometers high. If that's the case, we hope there's a tiny parachute attached to it, like those ammo and power-up boxes from the Worms games.
Alas, specs for the re-launched Vertu aren't reported in English, and our Chinese is a bit rusty. Rest assured, though, the phone won't let you play Guns of Boom, or even Pokemon GO for that matter. Look at it, it's about as close to running Android as the average earth rock!