Got the new iPad? Here's how to best brag about it

posted by Victor H. / Mar 16, 2012, 5:38 AM

Got the new iPad? Here's how to best brag about it

It’s Friday, but not just any Friday - today is the day the iPad hits stores early in the morning: 8:00am local time to be exact. So, for many of you, today will be the day when you can share your newly found joy with the world. You want people to notice - you have the new iPad.

Apple, though, hasn’t made it easy for you. The new iPad looks almost exactly like the old one in outward appearance, so you have to think of some innovative ways to make it clear that you’re done with the past. Emphasize you’re a step forward, rub it in iPad 2 owners noses. Okay, we kid, but you get the idea.

Nitrozac & Snaggy from The Joy of Tech used their creative brains to take on the immense task of revealing the best ways for you to show off. It’s all hilarious, all below and you can try it yourself today. You think you can do better? Feel free to share your ways of showing you’ve Apple’s latest and greatest to the world in the comments below.

source: The Joy of Tech

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Display 9.7" 2048 x 1536 pixels

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37 Comments

1. thelegend6657 unregistered

The last one . Lol

posted on Mar 16, 2012, 6:28 AM 3

12. atheisticemetic

Posts: 377; Member since: Dec 18, 2011

at least you dont have blood on your hands and you didnt pay 600 bucks for it. secondly...you like paying for your apps? :) (android coming soon to a BB playbook near you!)

posted on Mar 16, 2012, 9:15 AM 0

2. andro.

Posts: 1999; Member since: Sep 16, 2011

Well this article certain cements the view that Victor H is indeed entirely bias towards apple products in his articles. Also the pictures above also further reaffirm the known view that ifans are buying Apple products with the sole intention of showing off,looking 'cool' and being accepted or 'envied' by their equally idiotic ifans friends or peer. And sure we should have pity on them because if they didn't jump around waving their hands like a monkey in the 'I'm packing ipad 3' position then anyone could think they are carrying the older ipad one or the ipad 2 they already own as they are the essentially the exact same device and thus making make all the money spent on the 'new' ipad an utter waste as they would not have gained any social status,its tough being an ifan.

posted on Mar 16, 2012, 6:58 AM 5

10. SleepingOz unregistered

He's like Prasad from GSMArena.

posted on Mar 16, 2012, 8:22 AM 1

25. gallitoking

Posts: 4721; Member since: May 17, 2011

coming form a guy who's named Andro and loves Apple... we will take it as a compliment

posted on Mar 16, 2012, 12:56 PM 2

32. andro.

Posts: 1999; Member since: Sep 16, 2011

If you like being complimented for being an idiot we can all surely undate you with them!

posted on Mar 16, 2012, 3:34 PM 2

3. ilia1986 unregistered

Apple is like the Justin Bieber of the industry. It is dumb, arrogant, insanely popular, has a huge number of loyalists who would rather sell their own mother than allow anyone to say anything negative about it, and is very very hated. By lots of intelligent people who appreciate good taste. Contrary to Justin Bieber - Apple surely knows what a "German" is.

posted on Mar 16, 2012, 7:03 AM 5

5. andro.

Posts: 1999; Member since: Sep 16, 2011

I actually just googled that 'Beiber doesn't know what a German is' interview,its hilarious!! He truly is an ifan

posted on Mar 16, 2012, 7:12 AM 4

6. ilia1986 unregistered

Btw, I'm about to get an SGS2 (Finally!!) and give my iPhone 4 for my dad (it's really best for him). I love your avatar, andro an am going to do something similar in photoshop (Android stomps Apple or something like that) :D

posted on Mar 16, 2012, 7:38 AM 1

11. atheisticemetic

Posts: 377; Member since: Dec 18, 2011

i also just watched the 'Justin Bieber doesnt know what a german is' interview and i literally buried my hands in my face in disgust...

posted on Mar 16, 2012, 9:05 AM 0

4. remixfa

Posts: 14605; Member since: Dec 19, 2008

how to best brag about your new ipad. explain to your friends how some poor Chinese people got a pay raise to a whole 0.60 cents an hour while working 36 hr shifts lest they get fired and blackballed permanently.. and yet you bought it for $600+ so apple could retain their huge profit margins. Dont forget to wipe off the slave blood in front of them... That will make you look caring and intelligent.

posted on Mar 16, 2012, 7:05 AM 5

14. rf1975

Posts: 264; Member since: Aug 01, 2011

Not only the iPAD. We have to avoid all the product and brands which uses Foxconn facilities.

posted on Mar 16, 2012, 9:27 AM 2

20. ilia1986 unregistered

Actually they gotta avoid anything which has a filesystem and is customizable to at least some extent. Even this:http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_ksnyusILTeE/TRJNtJLk07I/AAAAAAAAD9I/SNj-Yn2V3C8/s400/_Nokia_6233_Mobile_Phone.jpg

posted on Mar 16, 2012, 11:06 AM 0

26. gallitoking

Posts: 4721; Member since: May 17, 2011

I want a chinese worker to sign my ipad in blood..

posted on Mar 16, 2012, 12:59 PM 2

7. TKFox007

Posts: 303; Member since: Nov 02, 2010

The still sell the Playbook?

posted on Mar 16, 2012, 7:55 AM 0

8. Slammer

Posts: 1515; Member since: Jun 03, 2010

The best way to brag about the iPad? Don't let it be seen next to an Android tablet. This way, no one can see what the iPad lacks. John B.

posted on Mar 16, 2012, 8:05 AM 4

16. atheisticemetic

Posts: 377; Member since: Dec 18, 2011

good call

posted on Mar 16, 2012, 9:44 AM 1

27. drtech

Posts: 135; Member since: Mar 16, 2012

That's funny as iPad is universally considered the best tablet by all tech blogs

posted on Mar 16, 2012, 1:00 PM 3

9. theBankRobber

Posts: 682; Member since: Sep 22, 2011

We can now say there is deff some fragmentation within Apple. IPhone 4s has a different gpu the iPhone 4 and the ipad 3 has a different gpu then both of them and the Ipad 2. Which means you can't make a beastly game for the Ipad 3 and just port it to other apple devices as they all have different hardware.

posted on Mar 16, 2012, 8:09 AM 1

15. rf1975

Posts: 264; Member since: Aug 01, 2011

How genius you are? Your mobile hardware and platform knowledge is amazing.

posted on Mar 16, 2012, 9:31 AM 0

13. atheisticemetic

Posts: 377; Member since: Dec 18, 2011

I'm being serious and literal when i say this, but how can anyone who knows anything about technology buy an apple product? You like paying more for an inferior product? I just don't get it...at all

posted on Mar 16, 2012, 9:18 AM 0

17. NDSmooth32

Posts: 3; Member since: Mar 16, 2012

I can see what you're saying to some point. As someone who has used both products, I can say that Android OS has much greater range as far as capability and features. However, I consider the iOS to be more reliable and consistent. Sure, it can't run widgets, but the Apps available for it run better, the battery life is considerably longer, and I'm not dealing with force closes, choppy performance, and poor battery life. I'd rather spend $629 on a VZW iPad than $550 on a Galaxy tab that I'm forced to sign a contract with all the while knowing that even though the iPad doesn't have certain features, it will work and work very well while maintaining it's value over the years.

posted on Mar 16, 2012, 9:55 AM 1

19. Slammer

Posts: 1515; Member since: Jun 03, 2010

Most everyone I've talked to and by my own experience so far, we have not witnessed any issues with Android tablets. Apple makes a good product, but they have also created the mindset that they are the only good product. Typical great marketing on the part of Apple. 10 to 1, most iPad tablet buyers have neglected to even try an Android tablet. Purchasing on pure thought process that if you don't own an iPad, you're not part of the iFad. A colleague of mine has claimed that they chose the ASUS for their company due to customization. Out of 37 Tablets purchased, only one was dead out of the box. So far, they have worked flawlessly. Individuals need to expand their minds more and see what these companies are doing. I posted my thoughts a few days ago that these companies are fully aware of how well Apple is doing in this market. They really are concentrating on quality and features to compete against Apple. For this reason, people overlooking an Android Tablet, are increasingly more ignorant. I know. I was an Apple supporter for years. John B.

posted on Mar 16, 2012, 10:31 AM 1

22. remixfa

Posts: 14605; Member since: Dec 19, 2008

don't kid yourself. all OS have issues.. including apple... especially apple because u have to manually update your apps and OS where on android the OS does it all for you without you needing to do anything. that generally means a lot less compatibility issues. as far as battery life goes apple fares no better. in fact the i4s gets a lot less battery life than the exynos based sgs2 in actual testing. the new ipad might have great battery life but that's not apple magic, its a massive battery.

posted on Mar 16, 2012, 11:26 AM 0

23. NDSmooth32

Posts: 3; Member since: Mar 16, 2012

I'm not kidding myself. I've used both products substantially and I've worked in the wireless industry for the better part of 10 years and so I've seen nearly every product come and go. Just because some apps on android update automatically says nothing about their quality when matched against the same app on Apple. You're comparing one Android phone when I've used 6 different models that barely lasted a day. It should also say something that Apple addressed the LTE power consumption by already including a huge battery instead of shipping it with a smaller inferior battery that only lasts 3-5 hours. I've used the Xoom tablet, Galaxy, and XYBoard and while they are all great tablets in their own right, they either have poor battery life, are too heavy (Xoom) or simply don't perform well. I used to hate Apple just to hate them, but when I finally started using their products, I see why they are always well received and popular even if they don't have massive updates from model to model.

posted on Mar 16, 2012, 12:28 PM 1

21. atheisticemetic

Posts: 377; Member since: Dec 18, 2011

tell that to the Asus Transformer prime :) (with keyboard stand of course)

posted on Mar 16, 2012, 11:08 AM 0

24. NDSmooth32

Posts: 3; Member since: Mar 16, 2012

I do love the Asus Transformer Prime tablet.

posted on Mar 16, 2012, 12:46 PM 1

18. EclipseGSX

Posts: 1774; Member since: Oct 18, 2011

Why does everyone keep calling it the iPad 3 when Apple specifically called it "the new iPad" smh

posted on Mar 16, 2012, 10:10 AM 1

28. drtech

Posts: 135; Member since: Mar 16, 2012

It's sad how every Apple article is crammed with these trolls. If you keep repeating the same thing over and over you're no longer trying to convince others. You're trying to convince yourself.