T-Mobile wants to make a drinking game of Verizon's earnings call
As per the usual way that drinking games work, there are different reasons to drink and three levels of how much to drink when something happens. On the first level, you take a drink if Verizon mentions "millennials" or "young people", if there is a "jargon free" sentence uttered in the call (T-Mobile claims this will never happen), or if Verizon references year-old network tests. On the second level, you take two drinks if Verizon talks about monetizing something (we think this is the killer rule), if Go90 (Verizon's media streaming service) is compared to SugarString (Verizon's failed tech news venture) or RedBox Instant, or if Verizon references leadership.
admits to copying Music Freedom, Binge On, or Mobile Without Borders (not if they do offer similar features, but admit they're copying, so that will never happen.) Finish your drink if Verizon admits its network advantage is gone (which it won't because it still has rural areas covered in a way that T-Mobile can't match), or if Verizon admits its "millennial" strategy is just a midlife crisis.The big moves are on level three (where you would have to finish your drink), but T-Mobile says these things are almost certain to not happen. So, finish your drink if Verizon
Overall, it's a pretty inspired bit of trolling from T-Mobile. It has the requisite honest points (competitors have been copying various Uncarrier features) as well as some flat out insults that skew reality (claiming that Verizon doesn't have a network advantage, even though despite T-Mobile's advances in extending coverage it still can't compare with Verizon's rural coverage.)
Really, the worst part of this drinking game is that you'd have to listen to the Verizon earnings call in order to play, which sounds awful (even if it is our job to do it.)