Thief.ly solves smartphone theft by reciting hateful PhoneArena comments for the stolen device to the thief

The creators of Thief.ly, however, sought a different route. Based on technology developed by ex-BlackBerry security experts, this app automatically activates itself the moment your smartphone suspects suspicious activity from a third party, and begins to bombard them with hateful comments and reviews about the device, generated in real-time from the passionate readers of PhoneArena. 

Caught in the firestorm of spiteful comments, full of bile and glowing red-hot with resentment, thieves find themselves discouraged and empty of any naive beliefs that the smartphone they just stole has any worth at all - be it monetary, emotional, or of a purely technological character. As a result, criminals feel compelled to get rid of the horrible piece of techno-junk by returning it to its rightful owner, apologising, and expressing sincere regret about their incredibly unrewarding purchase, as well as their condolences for the significant financial and emotional repercussions following the matter.

Thieves find themselves discouraged and empty of any naive beliefs that the smartphone they just stole has any worth at all.

Upon first launch, Thief.ly asks users to choose their handset, and offers the option to lock or unlock the device right from the app's home screen. After choosing a device, the app is ready to go without additional setup, save for selecting the voice which will be reading the angry comments to prospective burglars. The current version of the app has a limited selection comprised of "Microsoft Sam", "Android fanboy", "Bleeting iSheep", "Windows Phone Believer" and "BlackBerry Apologist", but more voice add-on packs will come in the form of in-app purchases.

Thief.ly has some additional functionality as well. For example, it presents a current database of the most stolen devices in different time periods, as well as a "blacklist" of devices that are so incredibly awful, even desperate thiefs wouldn't touch them. Users can also log-in with their Google or Facebook accounts and post ads for stolen and found smartphones within the app's social community.

Thief.ly is free and is available from the Google Play store.