We know about breaking in a pair of new shoes, but breaking in a new smartphone? Yet this is exactly what the Onion suggests Apple will be unveiling next - an iPhone 5C
with screen that has already been pre-shattered in the factory for your convenience.
The handset is targeting the female college crowd, and is “the best new iPhone since you broke your last iPhone,” according to Apple, err... the Onion. Since the device already comes with a cracked screen, you can't actually break it any further, is the logic here.
“The phone you love, broken,
” is the device's commercial slogan, and there is even the obligatory Tim Cook statement on the release, according to America's finest news source.