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The "New iPad" is ridiculous: here's why Apple didn't give it a name

Posted: , by Victor H.

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So there you have it: the New iPad! Wait, what? Yes, it’s not the iPad 3, nor the iPad HD. It’s not even the iPad Retina, or anything meaningful you would think of. It’s the “New iPad” and this is just ridiculous. Seriously, Apple, you didn’t forget to give it a name, did you?

We have one theory, which is just saying out loud what probably most of you are thinking. Since many will be getting the “New iPad,” that would leave the rest with the “Old iPad.” How uncool is that? No one would want to end up with the “Old iPad,” right? That’s one way Apple could have looked at it and let’s face it - there’s no way Cupertino didn’t think about that before launching its first most important product after the iPhone.

And we understand that it might actually work for the company's marketing. But this is a cheap move Apple. We for one feel a bit offended - weren't we worth a real name? Or is "iPad 3/HD/whatever" too complicated?

Afar from that, the “New iPad” is serious business with a stunning Retina display, a new powerful A5X chip with even better graphics, and improved cameras. It deserved a name, but it didn’t get one.

And the real bottomline is that we don’t actually know why Apple didn’t find it necessary to add a “3” or an “HD” after “iPad.” There could have been a better reason, but honestly we’re not getting it. Are you? Let us know your theories in the comments below.

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1. Giggity posted on 07 Mar 2012, 14:28 40 6

Jeez, why can't they just accept the fact it's an Ipad 2$?

3. darkkjedii posted on 07 Mar 2012, 14:31 10 31

Shutup meg

7. Smurf posted on 07 Mar 2012, 14:36 2 22

Shut the smurf up!

39. galaxyisking posted on 07 Mar 2012, 15:55 5 4

weak!

21. andro. posted on 07 Mar 2012, 14:54 29 8

Its simply called ipad because ifans vocabulary isnt great and most can simply mutter 'me want ipad' in shops so keeping the name simple helps them. Also Apple can now also sell the origional ipad to dumb ifans who askfor the new ipad as its the same name and they are mindless enough not to realise the difference

33. dr.cyber posted on 07 Mar 2012, 15:17 1

only because of the new revolutionary screen!!!!!!.... and some other things(1gb ram,4g and more

37. BlacRaZredge posted on 07 Mar 2012, 15:37 8

its just repackaged ipad... like the iphone 4s like giggity said. next year will hopefully bring "new" much more exciting things. i hope...
this repackaging crap is getting old...

2. dr.cyber posted on 07 Mar 2012, 14:28 13 1

haha something new from apple!!!!

4. danwatson posted on 07 Mar 2012, 14:31 10 1

They didn't want to look like they dropped the ball again by adding an 's' to the model.

5. theoak posted on 07 Mar 2012, 14:31 33 3

The "next" iPad will be:

The Next New iPad

or

The New New iPad

or

The Newer iPad

8. chapizzo posted on 07 Mar 2012, 14:40 5 1

just made my day, can't stop laughing.

15. yt6nin posted on 07 Mar 2012, 14:45 9

then the next iPhone's gonna be the "new" iPhone, not the iPhone 5...

18. mrfwy posted on 07 Mar 2012, 14:50 1

Oh maybe, Iquad !!!

28. EclipseGSX posted on 07 Mar 2012, 15:14 8

or the New iPad 2 lol

48. Jamus posted on 07 Mar 2012, 16:27 1

hilarious...

52. LoneShaolin posted on 07 Mar 2012, 18:07 4

Did Apple give you permission to use their logo Eclipse??

6. bayusuputra posted on 07 Mar 2012, 14:32 17

year 2013,
Apple Store, NYC

Customer: "can i get the New iPad?"

Sales Assistant: "Sorry, we are running out of that, we only have the Old iPad, and the Newer iPad WiFi, but we'll be releasing the Even Newer iPad in a few months for your consideration."

Customer: "Ok, then, maybe i'll just settle for the old one while waiting for the Newer Than The Even Newer iPad.. thanks a lot, anyway.."

36. Victor.H posted on 07 Mar 2012, 15:31 8

Ha! Should we imagine 2014 also? I'm afraid to go further into the future :)

9. baaam posted on 07 Mar 2012, 14:40 5

could it be due to Proview!! hahah

19. SleepingOz posted on 07 Mar 2012, 14:53 6

MOST PROBABLY! AHAHAHAHA
Well, what goes around, comes around.

10. SuperAndroidEvo posted on 07 Mar 2012, 14:43 8

The reason why it's called the "new iPad" is because the new A5X processor is just barely more powerful than a Tegra 3 & there is no game changing design aspects & the so called "Retina" display is really not Retina because it's pixel density is under 300. A true Retina display is 300 or above. So all these increments are not worthy of a name so the best they came up with is the "new iPad"

Their baby A5X quad-core processor will be dwarfed by the new dual-core Cortex A15 chips from ARM. Not to mention the quad-cores that are coming out. Qualcomm's S4 dual-core/quad-core Krait with Adreno 320 processors with its 28nm technology will decimate the baby A5X that the "new iPad" has.

Maybe it’s just me but that is my take on my Apple decided on the super lame name “new iPad”!

16. SuperAndroidEvo posted on 07 Mar 2012, 14:47 3

Sorry my fat thumbs get in the way I meant to say why..... NOT my! lol Couldn't EDIT!

31. SuperAndroidEvo posted on 07 Mar 2012, 15:17 4

The baby A5X is actually a dual-core, the GPU is the quad-core. I am so sorry but the A5X is more of a fail than I expected. lol

The 28nm dual-core Qualcomm S4 Krait with Adreno 320 processor will just destroy the real small baby A5X dual-core on the "new iPad".

Not good, not good at all.

11. gallitoking posted on 07 Mar 2012, 14:44 1 16

just Ilike i dont know about chips.. asking this geeks about marketing... well just read the responses above... I am in sales and I see why is called the new ipad.. sorry geeks.. google it...

23. squallz506 posted on 07 Mar 2012, 14:56 11 1

is telemarketing considered sales now?

i always imagine you as a telemarketer with a thick accent.

25. baaam posted on 07 Mar 2012, 15:01 2 1

LOL!! chix got owned!!

26. iamcc posted on 07 Mar 2012, 15:08 3 1

He sells bulls**t on a phone website called PhoneArena.

Oh, wait a second...

54. gallitoking posted on 07 Mar 2012, 18:17 2 3

nop no telemarketer. sorry.. and no accent either...

30. EclipseGSX posted on 07 Mar 2012, 15:16 6

You mean Walmart greeter, i guess that's technically "sales". If you see why then tell us, oh thats right... because you DON'T

55. gallitoking posted on 07 Mar 2012, 19:04 1 3

aww is that the best you can do... why not a foxconn employee while you are at it... damm grow up...

45. Mandroid posted on 07 Mar 2012, 16:18 2

unfortuanately............y.....ou are still.......a moron........

56. gallitoking posted on 07 Mar 2012, 19:04 1 3

cool and now what...

12. Penny posted on 07 Mar 2012, 14:44 2

I actually think that Apple did this to prevent iPad 2 users from getting pissed off. The iPad 2 is a pretty good device as it is, and I don't expect many iPad 2 owners to upgrade to the iPad 3 this time around, because there really isn't much different with the device outside of the high-power specs. People who were happy with the iPad 2 probably don't want to get a new iPad unless it offers a refreshed/newer experience as well. Apple probably realized this and will hold off on giving the iPad a definitive, marketable name until the next game-changer (by their standards) is introduced to get all those users to upgrade.

Obviously this is all just conjecture from me, but it is my two cents.

13. TimTebow posted on 07 Mar 2012, 14:44

dumb.

14. chapizzo posted on 07 Mar 2012, 14:45 3

the second i found out its called the new ipad, i knew this article was coming.
Thought Samsung had run out of better names for their tablets!
Actually, samsung should sue apple for copying them by failing to come up with a better name for the ipad.

50. Cwebb posted on 07 Mar 2012, 16:47 3

Bashing Crapsung and krApple in the same comment, I like you already!

63. bayusuputra posted on 07 Mar 2012, 21:49 1

hahaha! two Gallito-birds with one stone, eh?

20. fraydoe posted on 07 Mar 2012, 14:53 1 2

come on apple your better than that >.>

24. SuperAndroidEvo posted on 07 Mar 2012, 14:58 7 1

Not really!

22. SleepingOz posted on 07 Mar 2012, 14:55 3

It'll be named IPOD TOUCH 9.7 HD

27. Virile posted on 07 Mar 2012, 15:12 1

My guess it has to do with Proview, apple isnt going to name a device a name that they might not own anymore. Though with only 9 days until release they need to do something.

29. HGMIV posted on 07 Mar 2012, 15:16

So what's this one going to be called when the next iPad comes out?

32. EclipseGSX posted on 07 Mar 2012, 15:17 6

The old new iPad :P

59. cellphonator posted on 07 Mar 2012, 20:16 1

I don't like the idea of offending people because they like Apple, but your avatar made me laugh like a mad man!

34. quryous (banned) posted on 07 Mar 2012, 15:17 2

Its obvious to me, they intend for everyone to change the name of their iFad 2 to iFad Classic, with a little swoosh below it! See, simple, as in simplton.

35. Stinger2U posted on 07 Mar 2012, 15:22 2 1

I think it's pretty obvious why they didn't name their new iPad - and iPhone is to blame. They weren't sure how would they name the new iphone. They cant call it iphone 5 because it is the 6th iphone. They cant call it iPhone 6 because everyone would be wondering : "where did the 5th iphone go?". So they probably decided to ditch all names and call every iphone just iphone, and every ipad - ipad. I could bet all my money that the next iphone will be named just "iphone".

43. troybuilt posted on 07 Mar 2012, 16:12 5

If they did make an iPhone 6. iFans would call it an iPhone 6G. I remember when rumors last year about the iPhone 5 coming out people were already calling an iPhone 5G. Seriosuly? No carrier has a 5G network. I guess they think Apple makes devices 2-3 years ahead of technology and from what I've seen Apple makes their devices 2-3 years behind technology.

46. Mandroid posted on 07 Mar 2012, 16:22 7

I think you're giving iDiots way too much credit. You have to remember how incredibly simple they are. They can do little more than bleat, chew grass, and play their darling lil' tap games on their astronomically overpriced iPods (all idevices are variations on the ipod, but SSHHHH don't tell the sheep!

38. coy2013 posted on 07 Mar 2012, 15:46 1

Lmao the name "new ipad" its a revolutionary name for such a device this changes EVERYTHING again.....not

40. cellphonator posted on 07 Mar 2012, 16:05 1

iFail 2 (once in a while, we're human after all).

I'm sure there is a valid reason, they just will never tell you but it's indeed disappointing.

41. troybuilt posted on 07 Mar 2012, 16:08 4

cr@pple just didn't give it a name because they know that their iFans are mentally challenged and they don't need to spend more money over names. Just like the iPhone 4. People call it the iPhone 4G. News flash iFans, it's not a 4G phone! I'm sure if they would've called an iPad 4 iFans would call it an iPad 4G. iFans are just stupid and don't even know their own crappy devices. Besides I think Proview should see this as a copyright infringement. Once again Apple stealing names.

42. AbsentbebniM posted on 07 Mar 2012, 16:10 1 1

The answer is simple. It's a step forward from the original iPad.

Most Apple products don't have new official names applied. iPods aren't given renames, it's the public that adds the "X Generation" designation. iMacs are typically referred to in accordance with their processor, screen size, or release time, but most of that is public generated as well.

The whole adding of numbers is silly. Can you imagine if Ford gave new numbered (or whatever differentiator) to each new Taurus they put out? How many people complained when Volkwagen put out "The New Beetle" rather than the Beetle 2? ..as an aside, they actually numbered the Jettas back in the day and it was simply ridiculous.

44. Jyakotu posted on 07 Mar 2012, 16:16 3

Most consumers will still call it the iPad 3. Can't tell you how many people call the iPod Touch the iTouch. *shudders*

47. Mandroid posted on 07 Mar 2012, 16:24 3

OMG right? I look at them like they are the stupidest creature I've ever met, and ask when it came out because to the best of my knowledge there is no such thing as an "iTouch".
Then they look at me like I'M the iDiot, f***ing drones....

51. nb2six posted on 07 Mar 2012, 17:54 1

It literally makes me want to devour someone's soul when they call an ipod touch that terrible word.

57. Mandroid posted on 07 Mar 2012, 19:21 2

I'm going to go into a Ford dealership and ask for the new Vroom Drive. I can make up words too!

49. 7thspaceman posted on 07 Mar 2012, 16:40

Hmm folks they cannot be sued anymore if the name of their Tablet is the "New Ipad"
Hmm I think they should have renamed it "Newton" a name of a Tablet Apple made way back in the day. Hmm it did'nt sell too well but Apple own's the trade mark name. Proview eat your heart out

53. LoneShaolin posted on 07 Mar 2012, 18:08 2

I don't want to live on this planet anymore.......

58. roscuthiii posted on 07 Mar 2012, 19:39 2

New iPad? Is that like New Coke?

62. hepresearch (unregistered) posted on 07 Mar 2012, 21:38

Yeah, it is like that... but also cut 50/50 with powdered cherry kool-aid...

It might be slightly dry, flat, and grainy in your teeth, and it'll taste a lot fruitier...

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